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My own version of "'Twas the night before Christmas"

(Sorry it's out of topic)


'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the the house

Not a computer was on, not even a mouse

The stockings were hung by the plasma with care

That hopes that my 360 would soon be there


Te children were giddy and snug in their beds

While visions of PSPs danced in there heads

And dad dreaming of a computer on his lap

Then mom settled down for a nice cozy nap


When down on the floor it began to shake

It seemed like it could have been an earthquake

I flipped on the lights and ran for the door

For the wonder that I was about to explore


The moon was shining like an L.E.D. light

Which illuminated this Christmas night

Then I saw the coolest thing appear

Santa with a V8 that everyone could hear


His sleigh was bright red with not even a nick

It zoomed on with tires so thick

No Ferrari could ever be the same

And it speeded through the night, impossible to tame


As the moon shined on the paint, it left an unmistakable glare

The fact that he gets an awesome sleigh is just not fair

All of a sudden, he hit the nitrous, then it shot out fire

It was amazing that there were still any tires


As a laser in the midnight sky

It would shoot on without a lie

He slowed as he jammed on the brakes

It laid skid marks that left everyone awake


And then it a click, I heard his seat belt

His sleigh still sizzling, getting ready to melt

He headed for the chimney in a brisk walk

And fell down the flue like a big heavy rock


He was dusted with soot from hat to toe

And looked like a burgler with a bag of bows

Then he wiped off his dusty back

And set down his heavy sack


His eyes glimmered like a shiny nickle

Deep green like a sour dill pickle

His wide mouth held a huge smile

And a beard that looked as long as the Nile


His deep pocket held the naughty-and-nice list

A Rolex clamped to his left wrist

His coat smelled like grease and oil

Defiantly not the dripping of a London-broil



He was heavy and chubby like an old laptop

His large belly bounced with just a little hop

And a pair of big black boots, covered with snow

The glasses on his nose were worn down very low


Then he flung some boxes under the tree

Then stuffed the stocking and got off of his knee

He pulled out a heavy jet pack

And flew up the chimney, scuffing his back


He fled to his sleigh, gave the key a quick turn

Just then the gasoline began to burn

With the pedal to the metal, he yelled with all his might

"Merry Christmas to everyone, and to everyone a lovely night!"

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